Then I said something. I said, Suppose, just suppose, nothing had ever happened. Suppose this was for the first time. Just suppose. It doesn’t hurt to suppose. Say none of the other had ever happened. You know what I mean? Then what? I said.

–Raymond Carver (Where I’m Calling From: Selected Stories)

A Note to Motherland

I remember my Mother’s quiet countenance,

When She was once raged by the wind of reluctance,

Because my Siblings were tortured by a violent storm.

 

I remember the cloaks of sadness,

Of pain, of darkness,

I long to shred and tear,

Piece-by-piece,

To reveal the only light and might that I have

To save my only Family.

 

I remember when my Brothers and Sisters,

Struggled to stand, and moved as one,

To condense the sweet dew of hope,

On each leaf of hopelessness.

 

Until now,

I remember the mighty breeze of passion

Of lasting sympathy in our veins,

That was once ignited

To knot the languid laces,

And to seek, unbridled, for the everlasting truth.

Nobody reads this blog

Waking up today, I accessed my Tumblr on rugged phone and I was shocked that I suddenly realized that every time I post, followers just pour in just like lightning. But I was just pushed into writing in this blog speculating what am I doing on Tumblr anyways. What am I doing right now?

What am I supposed to do?

Sometimes, I get this sense of confusion about what I’m going to be in my life. Literature has always been my love, so is photography, and web design. You know when Saussure just came in front of me I was suddenly engrossed to reading his many-paged criticism about the language genre of different people from various disciplines. High five to him. He seems to impress something which I was really waiting to happen.

I’m proud that I was not waiting for nothing.

You know this is not all about photography, designing, and writing, like a pro I was really eyeing for something which I’m going to pursue. It’s already in a basket of fruits, all I have to do is to choose what to eat, choosing what to take pleasure in. Like I was just standing in front of those choices having a big question mark on my ass. Yes currently I’m writing, minutes after this, I’m reading.. hours after, I’m going to Flickr and photo blogs choosing only the most amazing which my eyes could catch. I’ll seldom eat because all that I am doing if to somehow placate the pleasure part in me, which is not eating. But I am still in the midst of choosing, but what’s good to me is that I always say to myself that there’s pretty much a lot of interesting times when I can have my choice to come out. I am certain that my interest would fall among those.

I’m having a quiz in our Spanish after this, and I’ve been learning just about the basics. I’m still using Google translate, I am such a loser in Spanish grammar, but I can speak fluently, in a sexy Spanish accent.